There's Gonna be Revival in the Land;

About 30 hours ago our boots hit the ground in Fairmont, MN. Now... I know what you're thinking, "Here goes the white girl with her cliche "my life is changed!" post. No. This is different. Maybe not. Oh well. Read on my friends, read on.

I was headed to Fairmont with the intent to work. You know, expecting some hard labor, power through it, and feel pretty good about myself. Something along those lines... but what I got was so much more. In honor of Brother Vaughn, I'm gonna say something I tend to hear him say frequently. "I'm going to be transparent with you", about EVERYTHING that I saw and felt in Fairmont, so you can get a glimpse of the greatest that is in store for the city of Fairmont.

We got into town, got dinner and walked into the Vaughn's house to eat, as we were sitting there, Preston started speaking with us about the town, the people, the other churches, the mission field and the connections that had already been made. I'm not sure what I expected from this, but I know I got more than I had bargained for. Never before have I seen such passion within a family for a city that sincerely needs revival the way I did that night. I'm not an emotional person, but I'll admit. I was ready to tear up.

Preston and Gail went on talking about how many doors God was opening, and there was no coincidence in the matter, God is working in Fairmont. We were told about the condition of the building and the state it was in now, after ample work on it thus far and throughout this somewhat lengthy introduction to our Missions weekend (of which I was definitely enjoying), and the power of God was so real it could have brought me to prayer in that moment, in all honesty.

I didn't know what to expect from the church, but after all I'd heard, I was ready to see it and do what needed done. We walked in and I'm not sure that I've ever seen such a beautiful church building before (okay, mine is. But I'm a bit biased.) even with the dirt and grime and everything that still needed to be done, there was a potential and an expectancy for that building and city like I'd only felt before for my own city of Bloomington/Minneapolis.

We started dividing out the work, and I offered to start cleaning, we went straight for the bathrooms and man oh man... did we clean! Those floors haven't seen the light of day like they saw last night! They were sparkling and we were proud of the progress. With floors, toilets and sinks cleaned, walls wiped down, etc. We moved onto painting. Music blasting and laughter in full swing, you could take a look around and see the future of this church in such a powerful way. SO MUCH POTENTIAL. This place was seriously transforming before our eyes... I can't lie, I was really proud of the progress. Wood was being cleaned, trim, walls and doors were being painted and the church basement started to come to life.

We turned in for the evening after singing a song or two (or three, very roughly might I add) in the sanctuary. It was late, we were tired and exhausted but we are still crazy so we went to Perkins to get food and hang out. WE HAD A BLAST. The laughter was so real, secrets were shared and funny stories were told. It's hard to ever come across a better night, but... you know, bedtime.

Saturday, we get coffee (first world problems) and went to the church and got to work. WALLS WERE PAINTED. Were they ever! WOW. So much painting. It was a good day. We sang, we danced around (aka, I danced around) we painted and everything else.

My only comment really about the people I had the opportunity of sharing ministry with is this, I never ever knew how effective and well oiled a team could be, until this weekend. We all really did grow closer and became more unified as a group by working. Hmm... gonna sneak a preach here, when you put your hands to work, unity will grow and strengthen. Okay, I'm done. Obviously with my temper and impatience, tensions were a little high by the end of the day, I am fully to blame for my impatience with anyone and everyone today. haha. We all know me. ;)

At the end of our work day, I looked around the basement and was amazed at the transformation that took place. I'm not gonna lie. I was VERY proud of our work! Wow oh wow. SO GOOD. It looks so good! Is it done? No. But that's okay because any progress made is progress made. It wasn't done yesterday and it's come so far in just a day. So we're done working, we're sore, we're tired, we went upstairs and took pictures and it was time to get dinner and say goodbye. Of which we did and the goodbyes weren't bad or long, we knew we were all exhausted and needed to get on the road. On the way back from Fairmont, our car had conversation about how incredible the Vaughn family is and how wonderful the church is and all of the work we'd gotten done. It's hard to not talk about. I was told to blog this because we all know I use too many words for just a facebook post! :)

I just gave you a lot of useless information but here's what I'm getting at. Ministry has many different outlets, all hold their own importance for different seasons of life and different seasons of change, and I've seen MANY different sides of ministry in my life. I've either seen it or lived it and I can tell you now, singing is important, preaching is important, being an usher is important, etc. Every ministry holds value, however, I've never felt like I had this weekend. I clean my church frequently and I coordinate the cleaning at my church, so I am no stranger to labor for the cause... but I've learned so much about this weekend and I hold no regrets on what I sacrificed to be there and how I spent my time. It was worth every back aching moment because I will NEVER know the impact that my "sacrifice" made this weekend. I will never know just how far this ministry today, will affect their community tomorrow.

Connections are being made, God is most definitely working in that city and I'm so thrilled to have been a small piece in the puzzle in what is going to take place there. Every moment counts, every interaction counts, every smile and helping hand counts... why? Because every soul counts. Every single one.

I can't live in Fairmont and I don't have much money to give to the efforts of their church and mission... but here's what I can do. I can give my time and effort like I did this weekend. I can pray for the Vaughn's and Fairmont. I can fast for their city when I fast for my city and I can continue to encourage them and their family when doubt starts creeping in. You know it will. You don't walk into a city to save souls and expect no kind of retaliation from the enemy. You just don't. I am so privileged to know the Vaughn family and to have visited the city of Fairmont, MN, I am privileged to have had the opportunity to ministry in one of the most un-appealing ways and I am privileged to have ministered with the people I got to minister with this weekend.

The call on the Vaughn family is so strong and it is no doubt exactly where they were called to be. I most definitely caught the vision for that city this weekend and I'm so excited to see the outcome of the sacrifice of labor and love that has been poured into this Home Missions effort.

Thank you for the opportunity to be there this weekend, there was truly no other place I'd rather have been!

Below are before and after photos (before is on bottom and after is on top) They're not the best photos, but hopefully you can catch a glimpse of what we accomplished in a short 24-hours!

Again, I'm blessed and humbled. Go forth and be blessed! :)

Thanks for taking the time to read this and please don't forget to hold the Vaughn family and the city of Fairmont up in your prayers.

{Places of Creativity}

I lead a busy life. Meaning that I rarely have a clean room. Yeah, I've read all of the pins on organization and easy cleaning "to-do's" but I'd rather spend my life, well, living.

Back to the cleaning thing. It DOES happen. It's just rare. First things first, my bed is always empty, ready for me to crawl in at any time of day. My night stand? It's usually cluttered with inconsequential items from my pockets and my purse and whatnot. and my chair in the corner? My beautiful navy chair that was really an answer to prayer, the chair that over looks my gorgeous bookcase (also an answer to prayer) and the very same chair that over looks my beautiful dresser that I found as a dump, and reclaimed as my own (in a lovely blue, I might add). That chair is often covered in clothes and weekend bags and my backpack and my computer case and often my computer that sits on top.

It's sad really. My chair is my quiet place of creativity. Where my thoughts form their own life, in blogging, in my journal, in my prayers, it's my place. My place of joy where writing is easy and life is simple.

My chair often gets covered up beneath the madness of the life I live. Sometimes, that's okay with me. But as I was cleaning it off tonight, I un-covered it's beauty in a new light. So frequently we get really busy, we throw clothes, trash, clutter, bags, so on and so forth, and it lands where it may. However, too frequently, all of these things end up right in the place that hold us up the most. Right into our places of creativity and peace and simplicity. Stifling the words that your mind is trying to breathe life into, silencing our peace and taking away our simple joys in life.

Today is a new day. As I write this, 12:01am rolled around. It's literally a new day. Take 20 minutes (or longer) to clean off your place. Both physically and mentally.  Yesterday doesn't have to dictate your happiness today, if you don't take ahold of your schedule, your schedule will take ahold of you. and that only results in stifled creativity and happiness. So grab a trash bag and a laundry basket and go to the place where it all fell... the clothes, the trash, the clutter, the forgotten to-do lists and the failures of yesterday, and un-cover your place. Your place of creativity, peace, simplicity and inspiration. Find your happy place once again and turn off the phone and the TV and the radio and the outside world and just let your mind work, let the words flow, and let God speak.

How to: Tips for being a Better Person... Confidant... Friend.

Change is such a silly thing. But such an important thing really. I happens everyday, every moment of the day.

You change with every choice you make, with every circumstance you face and with every single day that passes. 

Every day when you wake up, you decide who you're going to be, or who you want to be. Want to be - is really the change I'm writing about today. 

Change happens; you cannot avoid it. You can direct it. You can guide it. You can inspire it. But you can't avoid it. (by resisting change, you're changing, btw.)

I've been thinking about change a lot recently. How to do it, when to do it, why we do it. I just had no idea how to address the issue, no idea how to put it into words, which is a change for me. I'm usually really good with putting thoughts into words. But not this time. I hope I do the topic justice. 

In my opinion, the number one killer of change/inspiration, is the people around you. 

In everything I've tried to do in life, in every choice I've made in favor of change, had it supporters, and it's non-supporters. 

The first thing I have to address when it comes to change/change killers is friendships. 

What kind of a friend are you? Are you conditional? Are you only there to get something out of it? Are you loving and supporting? Are you mad when someone doesn't handle their situations the way you would? Are you frequently upset or negative? 

These are really random questions to ask yourself but they can't be left un-answered. 

I used to be a really cold/hard/negative/mean person. Granted I was like... 8-13 in that stage, it was still me. There was no one person to blame for the way I thought and acted. Just me. I wanted to change. This post is an accumulation of how I've done it so far. 

"You cannot control what happens to you in life, but you can control your reaction to what happens to you."

In short, it's how you react to everything, that makes you into the person you are and have yet to become. I was thinking the other day, "I love making new friends, because you can choose right then who you want to be, really. You can change who you are if you want to, and they don't know any different. A clean slate." 

Should that be how it is? Absolutely not. I understand that people make bad choices, I understand that people mess up and aren't who they should be sometimes, but once a person recognizes this, it's your job as a friend to say "Listen, I know what you've done, I know how you've treated me, I know how you've been before, but if you want to change that, if you want to become different, if you want to improve your character, I'm going to forget the past (as best as I can) and let you do that, and love your through it." 

Same goes for this situation, if you're friends with someone, and your previous relationship is like a student/mentor kind of thing and you give them that room for growth, that room to change, you absolutely CANNOT start acting different or hostile when that student comes to the same level as you. Once they've put themselves through growth and they've done the hard things and faced change and made themselves better for it, you cannot get upset or bitter when that person surpasses you in their life, in their ministry, in their faith, etc. 

Being in the teacher/mentor role in a friendship/relationship is an incredible thing to be apart of, you're helping someone shape their life, by being their friend, by being a sound board, by being there for them and giving advice when necessary, you're helping someone shape their CHARACTER. But if they become bigger than you, if they grow beyond the extent of needing your advice, to where you can just be friends and interact on the same level, accept it!  

Every class in every subject ends. Sometimes we're the teacher/mentor, sometimes we're the students, sometimes we attend classes with friends and grow together, and sometimes, some students finish that class and leave it behind, while you have to stay and finish it alone, or vice versa. Don't allow these advancements/setbacks to make you bitter, allow them to make you better. 

If a friend is better than you, that's okay. If a friend is not, that's okay. 

My advice? It's working for me everyday. I'm not perfect, but all of these tend to help me, even though I'm still working on a few. 

How to: Tip for Being a Better Person... Confidant... Friend: (in no particular order, really)


Build. Build people up. Find someones good qualities, and build on them, find someones bad qualities and try to show that person how to build those up into good qualities and talents and characterizations. But please, don't ever tear someone down, "Just because you can" or because "You can speak your mind and get away with it." Build everyone up. "Hey! I really don't know you, but your outfit is really cute." or "Hey, the way you find the best in every situation, that's really inspiring." or even "You've really inspired me to do this (or that), and I did it with no regrets!" Let people know why they're amazing. Because every single person has greatness inside of them. "It costs you nothing to be an encouragement to someone else." -KL

Push Boundaries. Life is exciting and scary and thrilling but sometimes we get comfortable with where we are. Try to be the friend that is supportive, but also the friend that always suggests/advocates for the option that pushes someone a little farther than they're used to going. Don't push it THAT far though. I'm not talking about throwing someone off the ledge when they're not ready, but if they're contemplating growth outside of their comfort zone, encourage it. The best thing to do in this situation is to lead by example. Push your own comfort zones, do things you've never done, do things that scare you, speak in public, sing in public, talk to a stranger (safely, of course), smile at anyone you see, wave while driving. These things often make us nervous and a little uneasy. "What if they think I'm crazy for smiling?!" Yeah, they'll think you're crazy. Crazy NICE. haha! Just go for it, honestly. 

"You miss 100% of the chances that you don't take." Live on the edge a bit. 


Facilitate growth. Allow your friends to make better choices, while loving them through the bad choices. Allow them to speak, dress, or act differently without you treating them differently. Whether it's for the good or bad. Sometimes people come into church, most of them don't want a big production made out of them coming to God or coming back to God, or even leaving God, and sometimes we think "Well, that's silly. That's not the choice I would make." THAT IS SO RIGHT. In fact, it's so OKAY. It's not the choice you would make because it's not your choice to make. Just love them through the change. Don't be flustered when someone isn't who you want them to be. 

Be Steady. Generally, people will never return the affection, love, or generosity that you show them. You can be the best of all friends, and the other person probably won't be. That's okay. It's exhausting, but it's okay. Live by example. Be kind, be thoughtful, be spontaneous, be generous and never look back. 

Lock it up and throw away the key. If someone shares a secret with you, don't share it with the world. I've had my own faults in this area, it's something I'm really working on. Be that sounding board. Be like the walls when you're told confidential information. You know when people say "If these walls could speak...." people marvel at what they would say, what they've seen, the secrets they've been told, etc. The walls can't speak, and for a good reason. Be a wall when necessary and don't ever jeopardize that. 

"Don't wait for people to be friendly, show them how."

"Don't be scared to tell someone the truth." ** addendum ** IN LOVE. Don't be afraid to tell the truth, IN LOVE. Sometimes it just has to be said, it's okay to say it, it really is. 

"Never suppress a generous thought." 

My good friend Lecrae (okay, so not really friends, but still) said, "If they ain't seen Jesus, they don't want to see the sequal." 

What a great way to say that you may be the only representation of Jesus that they'll ever see. When it comes to friends, strangers, waiters, cashiers, baristas, etc. Show them love and kindness, because Jesus showed you love and kindness. Show them Jesus. 

"Forgive the inexcusable because God has forgiven the inexcusable in YOU." - C.S. Lewis 
* this rings true with friends and strangers alike. God did it for you, try doing it for someone else.

The End. (for now). 

Can You be Pursuaded?

I'm on a kick pertaining to books right now - and possibly forever - so bear with me. 

I am a reader. I owe this portion of my life to my mom and my grade school teacher. I like to believe - and do - that my mom read as an escape from everyday life, whatever the reason, whatever the matter, she fell in love with Karen Kingsbury books, and encouraged me to do the very same. I now own 50+ of her books. 

and Ms. Kris Newman, my Teacher, Friend, Moscow Mom, personal proof-reader, my writing friend and everything in-between. She taught my school for one year. One year, and changed my life. Made me fall in love with worlds outside of my own. Encouraged me to see the beauty in written words and magical, mysterious places. 

The frequent misconception of books is that they're a world contained within two walls - whether paperback or hardcover - walls, none the less. But this is false. Books are created with the intention to be read, and to be released from the walls of their binding and spine into your imagination, and to take you on an adventure from there.

One of the beauties of books is this - If I read a book, no one else is going to see it the same way. You cannot read a book without expanding your imagination. Why? Because you are literally giving form and bringing to life, another world. If I say "They walked down their quiet, hometown, street together. Autumn leaves falling around them as they recall the memories of the past, reminiscing about the summers and winters and years gone by." You just created a street in your mind, completely different - I'm sure - than the one I pictured. You created a place within your mind of two people and the nostalgia of their past. Changing from autumn leaves falling, to summer and then to winter, and then back again. 

Am I too inspired by books? I don't believe that's possible, but maybe. Reading books, helps you to understand other people. By being able to step into another world, and step into the shoes of another person as they think and make decisions, and face unforeseen circumstances, is a magical thing that happens to you. You are expanding your mind to the thinking of someone else, and that my friend is why a reader, is NEVER narrow minded. Readers can see a situation objectively, completely unbiased. They can empathize with more people, and therefore, be able to relate to and help more people.

A lot of people may disagree with this one, and it's really just a personal opinion. But I think that readers made better friends. ;)

Reasons why books are better than e-books:
- You can read them in the sun. 
- They make your shelves look pretty. 
- You can get them signed. 
- They smell good. 
- You don't have to charge them to prevent electronic death. 
- You get the gratification of flipping through the pages.

Reasons why books are better than their movie:
- Because no one is telling you how to picture the story. You can use your own mind. I'm sure Hollywood just loves that.
- Movies are over in 2 hours, meanwhile books take hours, if not days to read. 
- Movies leave out too many details. 
- Movie trailers spoil the entire thing. Leaving nothing to the imagination. 
- Your imagination is limitless and there are limits to what can be represented in a movie.
- Books are cheaper than movies and provide longer entertainment. 

I may have gotten carried away, but some things need to be said. ;) 

If you can't stand your life, read a book, then change it. Books are inspiration between two covers. It can lead you to finding out what to do with your life, or just what to do next. It can remind you of the beauty in life, the beauty in the mundane, and the beauty of your very own imagination. 

You will never read a book and not take something away from it. Every book teaches you something, even if it's just to make a list of books to never read again. You'll get something from it. :)

I was reading a book as my friend Kayla walked into the room and she said "Oh man! If I would have known this was going to be a party, I would have brought my book!" haha. I love Kayla. Kayla good. :) This accurately describes my life. 

Other good and important reasons for reading books:
- It is said that readers are two and a half times LESS likely to get Alzheimer's. 
- You learn something new everyday.
- Reading is therapeutic and costs less than a therapist... depending on how many books you buy, that is. 
- Reading enhances memory - I think this is probably synonymous with #1 - but oh well. 
- Reading expands your vocabulary. Always good! 
- You live many lives. 

So there you have it. You're less likely to get Alzheimer's. You're more likely to succeed in careers and life. You can better empathize with people. You live many, many, many lives. Your imagination grows. Your shelves look pretty. You will be more literate. You won't need a therapist - unless you read the Divergent series, that is. You will have access to a never ending well of inspiration. and you'll make a better friend.


If I haven't inspired to you try reading yet, this post has failed me. haha! What do you have to lose?

Happy reading. :)

What the Future Holds

     I'm not a 'dirty' or 'messy' person per-say... however, I don't like cleaning my room. I only sleep there. Why should I clean it? I just don't have time for that these days. Anyways. I've really been wanting to spruce up my room, ya know, if I'm gonna spend the time cleaning it, I want it to look nice. 

     So I went to TJ Maxx and Ikea and I bought new sheets, a new comforter, and a new lamp. After I had a few of the items I wanted to spruce up, I told myself I couldn't take any of it out of the package until I cleaned my room. -_- 

     Well, about 3 hours later, my room is clean and rearranged and I set up my new lamp and I'm sitting on my bed looking at my room from a different point of view. What comes to mind? Homework. Yeah. I should really be doing that. But something else too. 

     The thought, that in 5 months, I will graduate. Wait. Like. What? How did that even happen? I remember growing up and wishing so badly to be older and to be treated like a grown up but now I'm thinking I should be careful of what I wish for these days. 

Where do I go when I graduate? Where will I work? What on earth am I going to do with my life? 

     I was in Lane Bryant the other day chatting with one of the employees there and I had mentioned that I needed to find a job and she said "What do you want to do for college?!" That question is just not for me right now. It's currently unanswerable. and I told her that. 

    She said "Whatever you decide to do... make it a career. Because with a job, every night before work, you think "Ugh. I HAVE to go to work tomorrow" You dread it. You end up hating it after awhile and you'll end up hating yourself for not doing something with your life... A career though? You MAKE time for a career. Being able to do something you love everyday? You make time for that. Follow your passions and let that lead you to the rest of your life." I kind of stood there really just in shock of what she told me.  

     How do you tell someone that you want to be ordinary? Why do I want to be ordinary, you ask? Because all of those tired, lonely people out in the world, they are ordinary. They don't need someone in a suit preaching at them all day (*note: You NEED a preacher in your life, I am not saying anything on the contrary). What I AM saying is that the people of this world are looking for hope. They need someone dressed in casual clothes, doing casual things with their lives. They need someone like them, to tell them something that they don't know. 

     They don't need all Sunday morning suits and they don't need you to bombard them with the "Hell Fire and Brimstone"! BE A FRIEND. That is all you have to do. Be a FRIEND to someone who is lost. A good friend, a friend that is the influencER, not the influencEE. Show them how good God has been to you. Live your testimony and I can guarantee, they will want to know what's different about you. 

     I always thought that Bible College wasn't for me. I've never even been interested. Until she said that. and I thought about the passions that the people of the world follow. Success, money, fame, fortune, health... and I thought... what am I passionate about? 

     People. I genuinely care about the lives of the people I see everyday. What is waiting for them at the end of the day? Family? Debt? Nothing? I still don't know if Bible College is for me. The thought of moving away completely disinterests me. But Purpose Institute? I could do that. Starting my own business? I could do that. That seems like the most effective way to meet people everyday and be happy about what I'm doing with my life everyday.

     I really don't know what is for me right now. I don't even have a clue as to what the future holds. Where I want to go, where I want to take my life, where God will take my life. But how do you walk?

One step at a time. 

and so it is... in my own words.

And so it is, again, that we start another year. But wait... what did we even learn in 2013? Were were successful? Were we happy? How do you gauge success and happiness and growth? Keep reading for my opinion... and if you don't want it, then leave my blog because THIS SHOW IS ALL ABOUT ME AND MY OPINIONATIONS. 

haha. Totally kidding.... maybe. Looks like you'll never know.

Alright! Moving on... 

Success; The achievement of something desired, planned, or attempted.

Success in my own words...? Success is a lot of things combined and ultimately, in the end, happiness. The first thing you have to understand about happiness, is that it is a choice. No one can give it to you and no one can take it away. It's a decision you make everyday when you wake up and sometimes have to remind yourself of when you spend a few moments unhappy. Back to success. Success is... making the small goals in life. Honestly. We're not promised tomorrow and It's cool to plan for years and years down the road... but I don't know where I'm going to be five years from now, should the Lord terry and I plan to take life as it comes. Success for me right now in life, is to have a stable prayer life, relationship with God and an active ministry (and to graduate High School). Later in life, success for me will be all three of those first things, but with a degree/career of some sort being used to serve, a beautiful home (this is on my materialistic list... I just want a beautiful home...:) and a family. Since I'm good at that whole motherly thing, I might as well give it a try. :) 

"In order to succeed, your desire for success should be greater than your fear of failure." - Bill Cosby 

"A successful man is one who can lay a firm foundation with the bricks others have thrown at him." - David Brinkley

Growth! How does one measure the depths in which they've changed? Here's my truth about growth. You can look at growth as how far you've come, what you've done and all that you've accomplished from one point to another... but if you faith has been tested, if your boundaries have been pushed, and if you've been through the valley and seen the mountain top, you've grown! Surprise! Congratulations! To me, growth is measured by how you played the hand you were dealt. 

"Learn from your past, set vivid, detailed goals for the near future, and live in the only moment of time in which you have any control; now." Denis Waitley

I've learned a lot of things in twenty thirteen but the greatest of these are the following. 

3) It's okay to say no. What?! No it's not! Someone is depending on me and... yeah. I've heard it all and I've said it all. This may be something I learned this year but learning is continual so that means twenty fourteen is the year to put it to use. Say yes and say no. Know your limits and understand the sky doesn't fall when you finally whisper the one-syllable word that your heart has been longing to speak. Say no enough to stay grounded and say yes enough to grow! 

2) You can't do it all. Wow. These are sounding really depressing. No, they're not. They're long-time coming realizations. Some people have talents and abilities that you don't and some people can do more than others, better than others. It's okay to ask for help, and cheer people on when they do something that they're good at. A little support and encouragement goes a long way, especially, when someone is doing you a favor! 

1) Something I re-realize every year and always know but it's always worth the mention. I am blessed. When I go outside, I have a coat. When I'm hungry, I have access to food. When I'm tired, I have a bed. When I'm weary, I have the Lord. I am blessed. Forever and always blessed. 

Top Ten Things I Recommend for the New Year! (In no particular order)

1) Don't make resolutions. Make goals. Short-term, long-term, however you want to do it. Make lots attainable goals and a few far-fetched goals. Resolutions have a bad rap. It's like saying "I'll try". The word 'try' is a set up for failure. Just do. 

2) Do/wear/say something that it's isn't really your style! Go outside your comfort zone, stick around there for awhile and do so with confidence. Usually, when you do something with confidence people see it as a part of you/your personality and they don't even know that you feel uncomfortable. Just another way to grow. 

3) Do things that scare you! Can't stress this one enough. I've done quite a few things this year that scared me to death (public speaking to name one) and they turned out just fine and guess what! I grew. What?! Yeah, I know. Shocking. 

4) Speak Life. "It costs me nothing to be an encouragement to someone else." - Keith Leaman. Wise words from a wise man, it costs you nothing but a smile or a breath to tell someone that they look nice, or that they have a nice smile, or that Jesus loves them. Guess what. If someone is a stranger, you'll either make their day and a connection, or you'll weird them out and you'll never see them again! Win, win! Right? Be daring.

5) Put on the whole armor of God. This sounds ridiculous, however. Make it your short-term goal to read Ephesians 6 with the rest of your Bible reading every morning to prepare for the day. They say it takes 28 days to make or break a habit, it will shield you from attacks of the enemy, give you strength to speak life and have enough to survive yourself, and it will prepare you to have the boldness to witness knowing that you're 'marching in the Lord's army'. 

6) Laugh. A lot and loudly and proudly. And don't you dare ever stop someone from laughing or making others laugh (unless they're saying bad things about someone or telling a bad joke. Then please, stop them. ;) If you're with a significant other and they enjoy making people laugh and smile, please don't stop them. Making people feel good is a gift that a rare few people have. Let them shine. As for you, laugh as much as possible. If you're the only one that finds it funny, laugh anyways. Who cares. Be crazy and stop caring what other people think of you. Laughing is contagious and it's the best medicine. 

7) Remember: Grace then Truth. Make sure people know that you love them and God loves them before you tell them the truth of the Gospel. Some people aren't ready for the truth and it hurts. But when truth is said in love and the message of grace is sufficiently communicated, the truth is easier to hear/understand. The other reason for this, is to build relationships. Whether or not you meet someone and they come to your church right away or not, when people are around you (given that you're living the right way) they will be hungry for the truth and the peace that you have in your own life. 

8) Praise. In all things, God is worthy, be faithful to Him. "When the sun says "I won't rise", When dark clouds fill my skies, still just know that I, will always give you praise... and when troubles on the way, I will always say, no matter come what may, I'll always give you praise." It in the hard days and the dark days and days when it seems like there's no way out, Praise. There are many examples of Praise bringing freedom in the Bible, so remember that when you're in a pickle and don't know what else to do. Praise. 

9) Read, read, read! I can't stress this enough. I hear that some people 'aren't readers', which I don't understand. I'm seventeen and I have over 100+ of my own books, anyways. Reading is such a stress-relieving, relaxing way to take a break from your own world, and jump into someone else's! Christian (and some non-Christian) fiction is a good choice, along with some other Christian Living books. Come to me for recommendations if you're wanting to start a reading career of your own, I will gladly give them. I like to believe that reading makes you smarter and helps you to understand how to put yourself in the shoes of someone else and understand their situation. 

10) Throw away 5 things a day for the 2 few months of the year. Just find 5 things. Around your house, in the car, in your purse/wallet. Anywhere really. De-cluttering makes cleaning easier and it makes life less stressful! 

Wow. That last one really wasn't inspirational or even helpful really. hahaha. I thought it was a good idea. 

As my last blog post of the year, I just wanted to stay thank you to the few that read and thank you for taking the time to read this REALLY long post. I really hope you enjoyed it. Stay tuned for next year. I may have some more interesting/thought-provoking things to say. Twenty-thirteen has been good to me, God has been good to me. I am greatly blessed and forever thankful. 

Be kind. Speak Life. Serve. Laugh. Choose Happiness.


 Happy New Year to all! :) 

Time flies when you're having... fun? Yeah. Fun :)

It's funny how sometimes you think and even believe that your life is perfect.

Ever had one of those times? You feel like, in that moment, nothing could be better, and if you died right then, you would die happy.

I am fortunate and extremely blessed to have had many of these moments and they all pass far too quickly. and lately I've wondered and often stand amazed at how things change in life, so much, so fast.

2 years ago, around this time I was with a few of the same people baking and laughing and having some Christmas fun and I had one of 'those' moments. Everything was happy and everything was perfect.

But now, 2 years later I am sitting in the very same situation but every time I have one of 'those' moments. It's even sweeter. I sit here at a kitchen table baking Christmas goodies, surrounded by people that are beautiful inside and out and watching my 'mom' decorate her Christmas tree...

I am so happy and I'm just completely at a loss for words with how blessed I am, and I thought I'd share to add to everyone else's Christmas spirit.

My mom passed four years ago and she has... not been replaced, but substituted for the most amazing second mother anyone could ask for. She checks up on me and hugs me and loves on me

like my own mother would and I can't help but to believe that my mom would happy with the substitution that has taken place in her absence. Miss Kimberly is one of the most amazing people I've ever met and an even better 'mom'. :)

And Brenda who doesn't know what I'm actually doing right now. But Brenda is one of the best people I've ever had the privilege to be friends with. She was my friend years ago when no one else was, and even now that I have a few more friends ;) she's part of my crazy little family. Not to say we haven't had our differences... ;) because we have. But I wouldn't change any of it for the world. :) Love you Nanny B!

And Carey and Whitney and Kelsey, I love you all also and I'm super grateful to you for everything as well but I'm getting the stink-eye from Nanny B because she want's me to bake. So that's all.

Merry Christmas folks! Be Happy!

Oh and hey! I probably love you too :)

Really!? Me?!

When someone describes how you make them feel when you're around them and it's not the way you ever intended to make anyone feel, how do you take that? 

I would say if you have any ambitions to be a leader or even a well rounded person; listen to what people have to say about you. No, they're not always right, and you don't always have to change yourself based on their opinion, but if more than one person has the same opinion than them, consider how it could further you, if you changed. 

I don't ever want to come off condescending and intimidating but that's what was described about me, recently. What's worse? That person didn't feel like I was approachable about it because they didn't know how I would take it.

Here's a word for anyone that has something to say to me but is 'intimidated' or 'scared', don't even worry about it. I won't be mad, I won't be hurt or angry. I promise.

I want to be approachable, and honestly? Chances are, you're right, and it's something I'm not seeing about myself and it just takes someone to point it out. I won't be mad or angry, and I want to be the best person I can be, if you can help me with that, then do! 

Odds are, I will probably think more highly of you for speaking what's really on your mind about me. 

Fb, email, text, call, let me know and don't worry about whether I'd be hurt or mad, life is too short to get hung up on things like that. 

My ego can take a bruising every once in awhile. :)

growing up:

growing up is a funny thing. It's not really learning what to do, but when to do it. 

growing up: advancing. developing. preparing. aging. maturing. growing. evolving. 

whatever you choose to call it. here's a reminder of the key points of growing up. 

growing up is knowing when to laugh and remember to never forget to. 

growing up is knowing that revenge is a dish best served cold (but can easily be reheated in the microwave of evil - sorry. Megamind reference haha). 

growing up is knowing that revenge isn't yours to give and knowing that life isn't fair. 

growing up is knowing that the Bible says "Unless you change and become like little children, you will never enter the kingdom of heaven." and can also translate into, if you're watching, listening to, or doing something that you wouldn't let your child watch/listen/do, it's probably wrong. 

growing up is being miles away from home (or feeling like it) but always remembering who and where home is - and that it's okay to feel lost even when you're home, because that tells you that it's yourself you need to find, not home. 

growing up is knowing that a budget doesn't mean you can't spend money, it just tells you where to spend it. 

growing up is knowing that it's okay to go without but sometimes you don't have to. 

growing up is knowing that if you have to question something, you already know the answer. 

growing up is knowing that life is glass half full most of the time, but that the glass half empty days are okay too - and sometimes necessary.

growing up is knowing that it's okay to not be perfect as long as you remember that Christ is perfect and you are to strive after him, not BE Him, which is impossible anyways, we both know you're not perfect. 

growing up is learning to trust God with the things you don't want to and don't know how to. trusting that every day will bring something new and everyday will bring someone new, and that it's your job to be an example and witness to that day and person. 

growing up is learning that someone is always watching you and looking up to you, and how to not let them down. 

growing up doesn't have to be hard, but sometimes we make it hard because we don't like change. change is uncomfortable, unnerving, and scary but almost always necessary. 

growing up is accepting that things change. I'm still working on that one. 

Welcoming the Pain

Most don't like pain. 
It's uncomfortable. It hurts. It comes out of no where to make you wish something had never happened.

Emotional pain. Physical pain. Mental pain. 

Pain can be miserable. But often, without pain, we wouldn't know what to fix. Without pain, we wouldn't know where we're broken, we wouldn't know how or when we're made whole again. 

I don't like medications for a simple reason, they block all pain so that you cannot feel so that you don't know where the pain is, but you'll always know what caused the pain and that will cause you more pain. You can forget and block the right now pain, but the point and time of impact will do more damage. 

Here in this life I don't wish to be pain free. I wish to be resilient. I wish to be stronger. I wish to be able to ignore it. But I don't wish to be pain free. A day will come with no more pain. No more tears. No more brokenness. But today? I wish to feel the pain. I wish to find whats broken and strive to find something bigger than that pain that I can lean on and believe on. Something bigger than me and bigger than you. I wish for something that can take the pain away forever and someday He will. If today is not my day, if today I am not made whole, if today I don't get my miracle... if today, I feel pain, that gives me an even greater hope and longing for the day when he truly makes me whole. 

I like pain. I welcome the pain. Maybe I'm weird, maybe I'm different. But while I'm here in my brokenness I want to look back and say "yeah, that's where my pain started" and be able to come to terms with that situation. 

1 Peter 5:10 "But the God of all grace, who hath called us unto his eternal glory by Christ Jesus, after that ye have suffered a while, make you perfect, establish, strengthen, settle you."

If my pain today brings me to a better tomorrow, then I will say hello to the pain and welcome it. Jesus is all I need. He will make me whole when the time comes. Goodbye will come when it comes, but for today, hope and faith is all I need.  

We Speak

We all speak of loss like we know. 

Like we know the feeling when a parent dies. or a cousin. or a sibling. 

Like we know the pain of seeing a tornado or a hurricane rip away our house and/or our family members.

Like we know the sting of the pain of divorce or adultery or any other kind of pain for that matter. 

We act like we know. But do we? So often we comfort people by saying "I know it's hard" "I wish I knew what to do or say"... but we don't. We don't find the words because we can't. 

Until it happens to you, you cannot fathom that kind of loss. That kind of hurt. 

I'm gonna be completely honest here: 

These tornadoes in Oklahoma recently, have made me realize just how blessed I truly am. How blessed I am to have a home and a family and a dentist and food on the table; random things that I am completely grateful for in life, because honestly, most people aren't as fortunate as me. 

Here's one of my biggest pet peeves. Someone who has it all. Parents, friends, family, everything they want. Yet they complain about little things in their everyday life like it actually matters. Those people that have never had anything bad happen to them. Those people that make me so incredibly jealous because honestly, their worst day is probably my best. 

I honestly struggle with that one sometimes. I'm like "God, why are they complaining. Why do they get to have a perfect life and complain about the small things that they didn't get or that didn't work out. I mean seriously, If they ever spent one day inside my pain... they would know." Aaannd I get checked right there. Some people honestly couldn't handle what I've been through. Some people would fall apart, and that's why I got chosen for it. There is a method to the madness. There is a reason for the pain in life, especially mine, and although I can't tell you what it is, but knowing that there is a reason, gets me through tomorrow. 

If we didn't have pain, we wouldn't know what broke and we wouldn't know how to fix it. 

Pain is there for a reason. 

Pain is there to remind us when we forget. Pain is there so that we never take another moment for granted, so that we say 'I love you' in every conversation. So that we cherish every single moment with our friends and our families and laugh ridiculously at everything for no reason because life is too short to play games and be unhappy and be ungrateful. 

If you have parents and siblings and a place to live and food on your table and a bed to sleep in every night, start counting your blessings because in all honesty... it could be gone in a single moment. 

I ran across this a long time ago and it sums it up perfectly. 

As we grow up, we learn that even the one person that wasn't supposed to ever let you down, probably will.

You will have your heart broken probably more than once, and it's harder every time.

You'll break hearts too, so remember how it felt when yours was broken.

You'll fight with your best friend.

You'll blame a new love for things an old one did.

You'll cry because time is passing too fast, and you'll eventually lose someone you love.

So take too many pictures, laugh too much, and love like you've never been hurt,

because every sixty seconds you spend upset

is a minute of happiness you'll never get back.

Don't be afraid that your life will end,

be afraid that it will never begin.

- Anonymous Author

Stay happy, stay humble, stay grateful.

Paid in Full

 There's an array of things to write about, but I honestly couldn't decide. Someone called me a great 'writer' but I am surely not worthy of that title. Rambler? Maybe.  But I thought again, maybe that's why I can't decide what to write about. I've thought since my last post, "Hm, what should I write?" and I even had a few good ideas. But none of them were it. I didn't feel the release to really write! Then, I saw this news cast about selling body parts for money. Hair - Blood - Women's reproductive eggs (weird as it sounds, very true.) - You can sell it all. 

That got me thinking.

Buy. Sell. Repeat. 

You're able to sell your car, your house, your phone, your TV, your time... You can sell it all. But today, it's not enough.

Material is no good. Not anymore. Every teen feels this dire need to rebel. To rebel in such a way that would show their parents, their friends, and even God how truly mature they are and how they can make decisions for themselves. That they cannot be controlled.

Rules? Who needs those? They can't tell me how to live.

To sell my body; to alcohol, to drugs, to men... that would show them.

What price is the world willing to pay though? And what exactly is the price for your body? Your soul?

A thousand dollars for your good nurtured pony tail? Thirty to fifty dollars for some of your blood? 

**Disclaimer: I'm not saying don't sell your blood. It's good, it saves lives. I'm just making a point.**

But what about His blood?

That's just it. Me, me, me. This world has given you the complicated illusion that your body is yours. That everything you have, is yours. But it's not.

1 Corinthians 6:20 "You were bought with a price, therefore honor God with your body and your spirit, which are God's."

He died for you. He put nails in his hands and his feet. But apparently that's just not enough.

Honestly, I don't think I know of anyone here on earth that would say, "Yeah, torture me. Let me bleed to death. Take my life. Because she/he is worth it."

It might not be yours, but you can control it. Your beauty. Your talent. Your time. Your soul, is worth it, to Him.

Don't sell yourself short. Don't sell yourself to drugs. Don't sell yourself to alcohol. Don't sell yourself to men. Don't sell yourself to music. Don't sell yourself to Hell and it's inhabitants! Just don't do it! He paid far too much for you to give yourself away to something that will never love you to the extent that He loves you; to something that will never ever love you to begin with.

He is willing and ready to give you that love. He'll leave the 99 for you. He takes the 99 steps. You take the 1.  Simplicity is the beauty of his love. 

Everything else is beyond that one simple choice.

simplicity. love. commitment. forever.

Happy Spring! Now go clean. :)

It's April now. You know what that means. Yep, Spring cleaning.

It's name and representation is fitting. That time of year when everything in you longs for a new start. Maybe you consume yourself with believing that spring cleaning really only concerns your house... or maybe you're the person that believes that it's all about finding the new you. Or possibly even the person that thinks everything is fine just the way it is. 

Or maybe you're none of those. 

I'm the type of person that has pictures everywhere. I kid you not, everywhere, they're all over my room. Pictures of good times. Pictures of happy memories that can take me into another world, with one glance. It's amazing how much things change over the years. 

But suddenly I've gotten this urge to Spring Clean. To clean out my closet, to maybe actually vacuum my room for a change... and, yes, to replace some of those pictures. You see, most of those pictures are happy memories, and they can bring me back to happy times in life, where everything was great, and peachy. But lately, I look at them wondering where the people in the photo's have gone. What path did they take after that picture, where did they go, what did they see, how do they live?

But some of them, remind me of change. The uncomfortable kind of change that makes your heart ache. It makes your heart ache because nothing is the same, those people, those places, those memories, are gone. The most gut wrenching thing ever, for me. 

Thinking about that changing, reminds me of myself. Where have I been? Where have I gone? What have I seen? Am I still me? Did I change too?

All of these questions usually lie there, unanswered. Maybe I don't want to face any of those questions, maybe no one does. Because everyone's past, good or bad, brings regret. Did I spend enough time with that person? Did I ruin the night because I was crabby? Did I miss out on something that will never come back around again? Did I take too much for granted?

Because people change, and life changes, and sometimes, it's not for the better... or so you think. But sometimes, in what you think is a bad change, a gut wrenching change, is something that is bringing you to a greater tomorrow. 

Maybe you were better off without that person. Maybe you were meant to take some things for grated. Because every decision you make, every thing you do, everything you are, changes everyday, and all of those things, define who you are. 

Integrity is what you do when no one is watching... but what about when people are watching?

What do you do in the grocery store, how do you react to the small things gone wrong in life? People are watching you everywhere. Are you alert and smiling when you approach the cashier? Are you walking around the store on your phone gossiping about the latest newsworthy event in the lives of the people you 'love'? Are you conscious of these things?

I'm a cashier, and I see a couple hundred customers a day. This has changed how I act in a store. How I act towards a cashier, how my mood is, am I smiling, am I friendly? 

Let me clue you in on one thing. It makes me incredibly happy at work to have a nice, friendly, present customer at my register. Living in the moment, not on their phone, not in a 'get me out of here', crabby mood. Just there. 

Yes, integrity is important. But so is living in the moment. 

If I were to challenge you to Spring Clean something in your life, that would be it. 

If I were to tell you that the cashier you saw that day, was sad after you left the counter because of the void in your eyes? Or that the very same cashier was put in a bad mood because you were on your phone, and not paying attention at all to what you were doing, or because you were just out-right rude? 

Would all of that make you think twice? Good. I hope it does. Live in the moment. Be happy. Be contagious. Make cheesy jokes about the weather. Make cheesy jokes about anything really. Just be there.

It makes people's day, I promise. :)

When you Spring Clean your house, I hope you take a second and spring clean you. Spring clean everything that people see. Don't hide it, take care of it. Take that rug you sweep everything under, and throw in the trash. Work on being present, and not gossiping, and being friendly to perfect strangers. You will be better for it.

Happy Spring! Now go clean. :)